Nike need a Celtic edit of World Cup future ad

The original is a cracking advert!

By now, you have probably watched the Nike World Cup advert where players get a glimpse of their future depending on the outcome of their games.

We think if Nike could actually see the future they would have known that Ronaldinho would not be included in the World Cup squad.

Then again, that’s a small issue and the skill in his section is exactly what you want to see in an advert;

Of course, a few teams in the SPL wear Nike kits with Celtic being the companies biggest money spinner in the country.

Therefore, we, in a fit of boredom or insanity, wondered what a Celtic themed Nike advert would look like?

It would open with the PLC boardroom with Dermott Desmond, Peter Lawell and John Reid scanning through a bunch of CVs on the table. Reid is holding them upside down to ensure no members of that pesky Green Brigade Brigade have applied for the managers post.

After narrowing down to a few candidates, the dream sequence kicks in with Roy Hodgson in the Celtic dug-out as the team runs out in Dublin for the final of the 2010/11 Europa Cup final. The stadium is awash with green and white as the almost “home” crowd cheers a goal for the hoops.

This then cuts to the forlorn figure of Ivan Golac looking rather windswept at Inverness after a Ross Tokely piledriver puts Caley two up and condemns Celtic to a place in the bottom six of the SPL. Tokely may not be able to read or write but in this worst case scenario, he could be signing the P45 of the manager and board of directors.

This should be enough to give Desmond and Lawell nightmares for weeks, and the two should bear this in mind when deciding on who to give the job to.

And Reid’s positive outcome, well, finding those weapons of mass destruction probably ranks highly.

The next scene features Neil Lennon in his usual haunt of Ashton Lane and in between ordering a round and giving some chat to some pretty girls at the bar, Lennon’s mind drifts off to what could await him if he gets a crack at the Celtic job.

The positive scenario drifts to a title run-in, post split game at Ibrox. The Ibrox scoreboard flashes up 90 minutes and the scoreline is tied at 1-1. Lennon puts on his last sub as the hoops have one final corner to turn the league in their favour. A goal-mouth scramble sees Morten Ra-Ra-Rasmussen bundle the ball home and send the Broomloan Road end of Ibrox wild. Lennon picks up the SPL trophy at the first time of asking!

The negative issue comes in the same scenario and location but on 93 minutes, Lee Naylor breaks down the left hand side and slices his cross so wide it ends up at Govan Cross. The Copland Road end erupts as three quarters of the stadium bellow in laughter and return to giving Neil Lennon the abuse he expects at Ibrox.

This snaps Lennon out of his daydream and back to the reality of having a pint in hand and a perfectly balanced midfield three of a blonde, brunette and a redhead in front of him.

For Neil, the reality is sometimes better than the daydream.

And of course, any current Celtic advert would have to feature Robbie Keane, sat at home with his model wife, discussing where to go next. The bright lights of Los Angeles and a lucrative contract with the Galaxy sits on the table and occupies the positive part of the dream. The kids are happy with the attractions, beaches and parks whilst the sunshine state provides the perfect background for Claudine’s modelling career to really kick off.

The downside for Keane comes vividly to life when the beach transforms into that luxurious bolthole in Lanarkshire called Fir Park. The sand is painted green but is no different underfoot as Keane struggles to maintain his balance and eventually tumbles after one twist and turn too many.

The scene fades out as Keane is carried off on a stretcher, cursing the decision to put the hope of a medal ahead of family happiness.

And when it comes to family happiness, who pushes the buttons better than Peter Lawell? The final scene opens with a Celtic fan reading the open letter sent by Mr Lawell to all of the Celtic family, reminding them of the importance of sending the club their money and backing the boys.

Depending on the fan, the positive scene alternates between the SPL trophy being paraded around a packed Celtic Park after a thrilling season….or the thought of countless nights out with the £450+ saving from not renewing. The negative part of that dream….well, any footage of the empty seats at the tail end of the 2009/10 season would suffice.

This summer is a massive one for Celtic and the PLC board must know they have the power to write the clubs future…for good or bad.

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